


Who needs sunshine?

by smaragdbird



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Bodhi POV, First Meetings, Gen, Getting to Know Each Other, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Missing Scene, Pre-Slash, References to Depression, Strangers to Friends, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-27 02:45:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18295271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smaragdbird/pseuds/smaragdbird
Summary: If anyone asked Bodhi, he would tell them that he first met Galen Erso when asking if he was waiting in the right line for food.If anyone paid close attention, they would also notice that Bodhi was telling them a lie.





	Who needs sunshine?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rosecake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosecake/gifts).



> In the Rogue One novelisation, Bodhi talks to Cassian about meeting Galen for the first time and Cassian notices that it sounds like a lie. And since you said in your letter that you want to know how they met I pounced on this possibility.
> 
> Hope you like it :)

No one else seemed to notice the man. His uniform marked him as one of the engineers working on whatever project was being worked on here on Eadu, so maybe that was why no one stopped him. Or maybe everyone else was too busy securing the base against the storm. Bodhi had been the last pilot to be given landing permission and even for him it had been a close call. 

The man slipped out of a side door that led to the path between the shuttle bay and the refinery building. It was meant for droids, not humans and especially not in this kind of weather. In a few more minutes the doors would be sealed shut against the storm and the man would be stranded out there in the mountains since the shuttle bay had been closed right after Bodhi’s arrival.

Bodhi glanced around but everyone else seemed to be busy. In a split-second decision, he followed the man through the side door. Ice cold rain hit his face immediately and with such speed and density that for a moment he couldn’t breathe or see. Bodhi raised his hand to shield his eyes from the rain and made a few steps away from the building. 

Being a storm world Eadu was never particularly bright even under the best conditions but it was evening and pitch black aside from the lights that came from the buildings and the occasional lightening ray.

“Hey!” Bodhi called out without seeing the man. In a way this situation reminded him of the sandstorms back home. This rainstorm was going to be no less deadly if he didn’t make it to shelter soon. Lightening illuminated the path for a moment and Bodhi could see the man maybe a hundred meters away from him. 

Bodhi called out of him again but his voice was drowned out by the thunder that followed the lightening. The storm was nearly on top of them now. He had two choices. Either he left the man to his fate or he could risk his own life and try to safe him. He would never be able to meet his mother’s eyes again if he went back inside now.

The path was wide enough for maintenance droids but that didn’t change the steep mountain wall framing it on one side that could be brought down by a landslide at any moment or the yawning abyss on the other side.

Trying not to think too hard about either, Bodhi made his way towards the man. The lightening was coming quicker now and showed that the man had stopped walking about in the middle between the shuttle bay and the refinery. 

“Hey!” Bodhi called again. He was close enough now that he could see the man’s bright uniform. “Hey!”

The man turned towards him, frowning with irritation. “What are you doing here?”

“We need to get back inside. It’s dangerous. They’ll seal the doors any minute”, Bodhi yelled. He had kept near the mountain side while the man stood a lot closer to the path’s edge than was wise in this weather.

The man opened his mouth to reply when lightning struck right above their heads into the mountain, followed by a deafening sound as the rock was split and boulders tumbled downwards. Without thinking Bodhi grabbed the man’s arm and pulled him against the mountain side. There had been a gap in the cliff maybe two meters from here. If they could make it there maybe they wouldn’t be squashed to death by the landslide.

A rock hit the side of Bodhi’s face but he ignored it. If they didn’t reach shelter soon, he wouldn’t have to worry about it. Keeping one hand curled around the man’s arm Bodhi slid along the side of the cliff, his free hand searching for the gap he had passed earlier while rocks rained down on them. 

He dragged the man with him as he found the crevice which thankfully was entrance to a hole large enough for both of them. It had been just in time too because as soon as they were both inside the landslide came down in full force.

For few moments neither of them said anything. Bodhi was breathing harshly and the man next to him did too but at least they were alive. Since he had just come in, he was wearing his uniform which meant he had all the little things with him that he usually carried around in it including his com link and a torch.

The small light flickered to life and illuminated their surroundings. The crevice was bigger than Bodhi had anticipated. It was a cave not just a hole in the ground.

“What were you thinking following me?” The man was just as drenched as he was and sounded pretty damn irritated for someone whose life had just been saved.

“What were you doing outside in the first place?” Bodhi asked back, just as irritated.

“None of your business”, the man replied.

“Would you have rather died out here?” Bodhi bit out before he realized that the answer to that question was probably yes. There were few other explanations that made sense.

The man looked aside, pressing his lips together, which was as good as a yes. Suddenly Bodhi felt out of his depth. Should he ask why the man had wanted to commit suicide? Or should he rather not ask? He didn’t even know this man’s name.

“I’m Bodhi”, he said eventually, feeling that they should at least know each other’s names if they were going to be stuck here.

“Galen”, the man said. He was in his fifties if Bodhi had to guess and he looked pale and tired, even more than Bodhi felt and he had been on a 14-hour flight before he had been caught up in a stranger’s suicide attempt by storm.

Bodhi wondered if saying “nice to meet you” was appropriate given the situation. Instead he said, “I have a com-link but with the storm I don’t think anyone’s going to look for us any time soon.” He doubted that anyone would be looking for him at all but Galen was one of the engineers and therefore much more important than a mere cargo pilot.

“I’m sorry”, Galen said and he sounded like he meant it too.

“I didn’t have to follow you”, Bodhi said. Somehow he didn’t think that letting an already suicidal man take the blame for his decision would be a good idea. “It was my choice.”

Galen gave him a tired smile but didn’t reply. 

“I’m one of the cargo pilots”, Bodhi offered. Maybe he could take Galen’s mind off of his suicide attempt if he kept talking with him. “I just came in from Ilu.”

“That’s an ice world, isn’t it?” Galen asked. At least he was responding to Bodhi.

“It’s pretty damn cold”, Bodhi confirmed, trying not to think about the fact that he was drenched to the bone and Eadu wasn’t exactly warm either. “I mean I’m from a cold desert world but Ilu is something else. Not my favourite planet by a large margin.”

“And which is your favourite planet?” Galen asked. He sounded defeated as if he had accepted that having a conversation with Bodhi was inevitable. Or maybe he had just realized that he wasn’t going to die as he had obviously planned to.

“I quite like Scarif to be honest”, Bodhi gave him a sheepish grin. “Though the stormtroopers always tell horror stories about the creatures that lurk in the water.”

“Next time you go there you can call them out on their lies. There is nothing on Scarif, the Empire made sure of that”, Galen said with the same kind of bleak resignation his mother used when she talked about the Jedi temple.

Bodhi didn’t know what to reply to that. What Galen was implying was pretty horrifying, the kind of story he would’ve expected from the people his sister hung around with but not from an Imperial engineer who was working on a base that required a security clearance even from a lowly cargo pilot like himself.

“You’re bleeding”, Galen said suddenly, looking at the side of Bodhi’s face near his hairline. 

Bodhi reached up and his fingers came away red. “One of the rocks struck me.” Now that he was thinking about it, his head did hurt quite a bit. He swayed slightly on his feet.

Galen grabbed his arm to steady him. “You should sit down.”

“I’m fine, it’s nothing”, Bodhi said but he didn’t fight it when Galen helped him to sit down on the cave floor, his back leaning against the wall. He flinched when Galen shone the light in his eyes.

“I’m not a medical expert but I think you have a concussion”, Galen said. He searched his pocket and then pressed a handkerchief to the side of Bodhi’s head. “I’m sorry”, he added quietly.

“I should’ve stayed in bed today”, Bodhi said more to himself than to Galen. Now that the adrenaline was wearing off he was not only feeling the concussion but also all the scrapes and bruises and every single of the twenty hours he had been awake already. He was so damn tired that even the pounding headache and the cold and wet didn’t keep his eyes from dropping close.

“Bodhi, which planet are you from?” Galen asked, pressing the handkerchief a little harder on Bodhi’s wound no doubt to keep him awake.

Bodhi forced his eyes open. “I’m from Jedha”, he said. “You know it?”

“I’ve heard of it”, Galen replied. “It’s home of one of the oldest Jedi temples in the galaxy and a place of pilgrimage even today.”

“It’s a ruin”, Bodhi replied. “People still come but there’s nothing left. Not the Jedi and not their temple either. Did you ever meet a Jedi?”

Galen shook his head. “My wife did. She was a true believer in the Force.”

“But she’s not anymore?” Bodhi asked.

Galen averted his eyes. “She’s dead.”

Bodhi felt awkward for asking so of course he made it worse by saying, “I’m sorry. Is that why you wanted to kill yourself?”

“No”, the look Galen gave him was hard and sharp. “And I would appreciate if you don’t mention it to anyone.”

“I won’t”, Bodhi assured him quickly. “I’m sorry I asked. It’s not my place.”

“Considering it’s the reason for this mess in the first place I can’t fault you for asking. But I can’t answer you either.”

“Will you try again?”

“Maybe, I don’t know.” Galen sounded so lost that Bodhi felt the urge to reach out and touch him, to reassure him that whatever had him considering suicide wasn’t actually that bad. But considering they didn’t even know each other for an hour yet, he kept his mouth shut.

“You said you have a com-link?” Galen asked eventually just when Bodhi nearly dropped off into sleep again. 

Bodhi nodded and unclasped the com-link from his wrist. He gave it to Galen, who activated it while Bodhi kept the handkerchief pressed to his wound. It was soaked with blood by now but they didn’t have anything else and so far his headache didn’t seem to get worse.

“This is Chief Engineer Galen Erso, Eadu Base do you read me?” Galen repeated the sentence a few times but there was no answer. He gave Bodhi a defeated look. “I hope it’s the storm and not the rocks that block the transmission.”

“It’s the storm”, Bodhi replied. “It’s an ion storm. I had to fly blind when I came in. It messes with the instruments as well.”

Even in the spare light from his torch Galen looked impressed. “How long have you been flying?”

“I was cleared for Eadu three months ago and I’ve been flying cargo for three years now after I finished my two years at the flight academy”, Bodhi told him. A part of him still felt rankled at his failure at the academy but at least he hadn’t washed out completely. He had a job which was more than most people on Jedha could say.

“Why didn’t you continue?” Galen asked the question that everyone asked when Bodhi talked about having been to the flight academy.

“Didn’t have the grades”, he answered. By now he could say it without letting on how disappointed in himself he was. 

“I find that hard to believe if you flew blind through an ion storm”, Galen replied. “We’ve lost more than one pilot to those over the years.”

“How long have you been here?”

“Thirteen years give or take a few months.”

For a moment Bodhi felt tempted to ask if that was why Galen had attempted suicide. Thirteen years on Eadu would be enough to drive anyone into depression. But maybe that was just because he came from a world that had on average 12 hours of sunshine each day. So instead Bodhi asked from which planet Galen came.

“Grange”, Galen said. Bodhi had never heard this name before. “It’s a small agricultural planet in the Rocantor Sector. There’s not much there.” Galen shook his head and looked at Bodhi. “Would you mind if I sit next to you? It might be warmer for both of us.”

The question surprised Bodhi. “No, it’s fine.” It was not necessarily warmer but it felt reassuring to have Galen next to him nonetheless. 

Galen tried the com-link again but to no avail. The storm was still raging but at least the landslide had closed the entrance and the cave was dry. “How’s the head?” Galen asked when he gave up for the time being.

“It hurts”, Bodhi said. “But I’ve had worse.”

“Really?” Galen sounded sceptical.

“Sure, I mean I can’t remember at the moment but I’m certain I had worse injuries. Probably the time I had to escape pirates.”

“Sounds like a story you should tell me.”

“So I don’t fall asleep?”

“So you don’t slip into unconsciousness from a head injury”, Galen replied. “Has the pain been getting worse?”

“No”, Bodhi said truthfully, “I’m just really tired. I’ve been awake for over twenty hours.”

“Then your rescue of me was due to impaired judgment caused by lack of sleep.”

“Thought you weren’t a medical expert.”

“I used to watch holo-vids.”

“Not anymore.”

Galen’s lips became a tight line. “I’m too busy with my work.”

“I watch a lot of them”, Bodhi picked up the conversation. “There’s not much to do on long hauls when there’s no pirates around.”

“You must have seen a lot of planets.”

“I guess”, Bodhi shrugged. “Spaceports all look the same.” He was so tired he had to force each word from his mouth.

“I’m going to let you sleep if you don’t mind me waking you up every now and then to check you’re still okay”, Galen said after a long pause.

“You’re not going to do something stupid, are you?” Bodhi asked, suspicious of Galen’s sudden change of mind.

“I’m not going to tear open my wrist with my teeth if that’s what you worried about.” Galen’s attempt at a lighter tone fell flat with Bodhi’s knowledge that he had meant to kill himself earlier on.

“It’s okay, I’m awake now”, Bodhi lied and rubbed his eyes. “You wanted to hear about the planets I’ve been to, didn’t you?”

“Bodhi, you don’t have to – “

“I feel like I do”, Bodhi interrupted him, meeting Galen’s eyes. For a moment they stared at each other almost confrontationally but then Galen gave in.

“What about the pirates?”

“I’ll tell you that when we’re rescued.”

“It’d better be a good story if you’re making me wait.”

“It’s the best.”

/

Bodhi talked about the planets he had seen, about the other pilots, about the most outrageous rumours he had heard, even a story or two about his time at the flight academy. A few times he managed to get a smile from Galen who eventually told Bodhi a few stories in return about his home planet. Apparently pushing over sleeping nerfs was a popular past time on agricultural planets.

In between they tried the com-link again and again. By the time they were rescued Bodhi had been awake for 26 hours and was ready to believe that one could sleep and speak at the same time. 

“Erso?” Bodhi heard someone call from the other side of the blocked cave entrance.

“We’re here”, Galen yelled. As if to confirm they had been heard the rocks began to crumble and suddenly watery grey light flooded through the crevice. Galen stood up and pulled Bodhi to his feet as well. He was still feeling dizzy and swayed slightly but he couldn’t have said if it was from the concussion or the exhaustion. “I’ve got you”, Galen said as he pushed Bodhi towards the entrance. 

Someone else grabbed his arm and helped him to climb outside. After the hours in the cave with only the light of his torch daylight felt offensively bright and he shielded his eyes from it. Rain hit his face, not as densely as earlier but still as cold.

“We were worried about you, sir”, the base commander said as he personally helped Galen climb through the opening and someone wrapped a thermo blanket around Galen’s shoulders. “Do you need medical attention?”

“I’m fine”, Galen said and a part of Bodhi wanted to laugh at the absurdity of that sentence. Fine was the last thing Galen was. “But Ensign Rook needs medical attention.”

Whereas no one had been paying attention to him, Bodhi could feel everyone was looking at him now. “Does he indeed?” The Base commander’s tone was sharp and distrustful. “How did you end up here anyway?”

Bodhi glanced at Galen before turning his eyes back at the commander. “I don’t remember, sir. But Chief Engineer Erso told me that he saw me on the maintenance path and he left the base to warn me of the sealing of the doors. I assume I wanted to take a short cut between the shuttle bay and the base and watch the storm. I’m from a desert world, sir. I’ve never seen anything like this before and underestimated the danger.” From the corner of his eyes he could see Galen’s eyes widen as Bodhi lied straight in the commander’s face. 

“That was very foolish thing to do, Ensign Rook”, the commander said. 

“I know, sir”, Bodhi averted his eyes as if he was ashamed. He knew he would probably lose his security clearance, maybe even get fired altogether but he had promised Galen not to tell the truth. “It won’t happen again. I learned my lesson, sir.”

The commander sneered at him before he turned to Galen. “I congratulate you for your bravery, Erso. You showed more courage than this idiot of a backwater cargo pilot deserved.”

“Thank you”, Galen replied. “But I was just as foolish going out into the storm. And Ensign Rook still needs medical attention. He has a concussion.”

When the commander looked like he was going to refuse, Galen added, “Ensign Rook received his security clearance for a reason. This base cannot afford to lose a talented pilot like him and Director Krennic won’t be happy about any further delays that would be caused by having to clear another pilot in his stead.”

“I’ll bow to your judgment”, the commander said, clearly unhappy about it. “See that the pilot gets checked out so he can go back to doing his job instead of wandering around.”

Two of the stormtroopers grabbed him and marched him towards the base as if he was a prisoner. Bodhi glanced back at Galen but Galen was still talking to the commander and didn’t spare him another look. 

/

Bodhi hadn’t expected to see Galen again after their encounter. And he probably wouldn’t have if Galen hadn’t ended up in food line behind Bodhi two weeks later.

“Is this the line for the food?” Someone asked behind him, not Galen, but the pilot behind him. Bodhi turned around the answer already on his tongue when he recognised Galen over the pilot’s shoulder.

“Ensign Rook”, Galen said. There was surprise in his voice but it didn’t sound entirely sincere, almost as if he was trying to hide that he had recognised Bodhi much earlier.

“Sir”, Bodhi replied. He wasn’t sure how to react. He hadn’t expected to see Galen ever again or to even keep his security clearance for Eadu but that had probably happened due to Galen’s interference.

“Well?” The pilot asked.

“You’re in the right line”, Bodhi told her and stepped aside so they swapped places in the line. “How are you?” He asked Galen, a note of concern colouring his voice that he couldn’t keep out.

“I’m fine”, Galen replied but Bodhi couldn’t tell if he was being honest or not. “I’m very busy.”

“Me, too”, Bodhi gave him a smile. “Fourteen flight are becoming the norm. If I had known about this I would’ve thought twice about accepting the security clearance.”

“But you would have accepted anyway?”

“Oh yeah”, Bodhi replied. “The food is much better here and I got a newer astromech. My old one was an ancient TR-3 that kept plotting a course to the Unknown Regions. I had to double check everything.”

If he was boring Galen with his inane stories about the hardships of a cargo pilot’s life then Galen was too polite to show it. “Where did you fly in from.”

Bodhi hesitated for a moment. “I can tell you, right?”

It wasn’t a smile but the corners of Galen’s mouth lifted slightly. “Yes, you can.”

“Ilum.”

“I’ve never been there.”

“Don’t”, Bodhi advised him. “It’s very cold. Very, very cold.”

“You’re from a hot desert world then.”

“I wouldn’t call Jedhaa hot.”

“What would you call it then?”

“Appropriately tempered?”

This time he did get a smile from Galen even if it was just a quick quirk of his lips. Their conversation was interrupted when first Bodhi and then Galen filled their trays with food. To Bodhi’s surprise Galen’s ration was the same as his even though he was the Head Engineer and as such should’ve gotten special treatment.

He expected them to go their separate ways after this but to his surprise, Galen asked, “Do you mind if I join you?”

“Not at all”, Bodhi replied and looked around. There were no other people wearing the same uniform as Galen, which was not surprising. By Eadu’s cycle, though it was hard to tell under the constant cloud cover, it was late at night but the facilities used the by the freighter pilots were open around the clock due to their often erratic schedule.

“My colleagues already retired for the night”, Galen explained after they had sat down. “I ended up working late. There isn’t much else to do on Eadu.”

Bodhi swallowed a comment about hiking and instead said, “Maybe you should join a holo-net Dejarik league.”

The corners of Galen’s mouth twitched. “Are you advertising gambling?”

“It’s not gambling if you do it for the intellectual challenge instead of money”, Bodhi replied without missing a beat. 

“Do you play then?”

“I do.”

“Would you care for a match?” Galen asked, glancing briefly at Bodhi and then down at his hands. Almost as if he was ashamed to ask.

Bodhi had already seen him at his worst and he could see where that desperation, that loneliness bled out through the cracks in Galen’s carefully crafted mask. He remembered Galen telling him that he hadn’t left Eadu in 13 years. He thought about the money and favours and fake IDs that were owed to him as gambling debts in every port he had been to. How they would allow him to disappear if, no when he wanted to. Bodhi suddenly realised that he was probably a lot freer than Galen, despite their difference in status.

Galen was still looking at his hands, waiting for Bodhi’s answer but the tension in his posture told Bodhi that he was expecting to be denied.

“Sure”, Bodhi said, “There really is nothing better to do here.”

At Galen’s obvious surprise Bodhi smiled and added, “Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you.”

It startled something akin to a laugh from Galen’s mouth. “Should I extend you the same courtesy?”

Bodhi snorted. “You’re looking at the best Dejarik player in the Imperial freighter pilot fleet.”

“Well then, there’s a board in the breakroom”, Galen said, looking around as if to check if they were being overheard.

“I don’t have the clearance to be there”, Bodhi replied.

“You do if I give it to you”, Galen said, sounding strangely decisive like he had when they had been rescued by the top brass himself. 

Bodhi was a little startled by the sudden change in demeanour but then he relaxed, “You’ll change your mind about that once I’ve beaten you.”

“What if I beat you?” Galen asked, something akin to a gleam in his eye but weaker, like a flicker in the embers of a long-extinguished fire.

“Then I won’t go easy on for the second match”, Bodhi answered. He was excited that he would get to know Galen better, that there was more to him than the desperate and lonely man he had first met.


End file.
